Poets United this week has as its theme, “Let your song be delicate”. Here is my offering:
At Night
Night fell softly, covering all
As if in flakes of blue-black snow;
Silence reigns, sky revolves.
I fought with sleeplessness
And won – as for my prize:
Your remembrance in a dream.
And it was as though I had drunk
A deep draught of sweet red wine,
Mixed with oleander poison, green.
Stars sparkle like tears falling,
The moon absent, perhaps it has set,
And an owl hoots.
I stir and turn, wakeful once again,
The room cold, dark, quiet,
And by my side, an empty space…
Oh you captured the tone and dark mood so perfectly here. It has an ominous feel to it - so well done!
ReplyDeleteOh the oleander poison, the absence looms larger, and everything beautiful is a mere reminder. Been there. Such delicate sleep in a sweet poem, such pain.
ReplyDeleteMozart would have composed this song. Some dark somber tones indeed.
ReplyDeleteI think that empty space beside you is influencing the song you are hearing in the night.
ReplyDeleteAlone can be so very loud.
Oh, the silent song of the darkness of the night.. can sometimes be eerie and sometimes soothing.
ReplyDeletePowerful write.
I like this. Remembering someone in a dream can definitely be a delicate experience. Sometimes it feels so very real, and it is hard to believe that beside one there is only an empty place. I wonder if one reached over one could feel the warmth of what was (never) there. An evocative poem, Nick.
ReplyDeleteOh the bitter-sweetness of that dream! Vividly written.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you've captured the intensity of the night, which describes your pain, your loss, her absence. Very well done. Enjoyed reading it.
ReplyDeleteMagical the blue black snow.. nicely done!
ReplyDeleteLoss pain and loneliness...feelings magnified at night. Sad and lovely poem.
ReplyDelete"blue-black snow"...takes the lead to that bittersweet realm of an empty space...dark and beautiful....
ReplyDeleteAn exquisite piece! The stars sparkling like falling tears got me...
ReplyDeleteThat silence aches and sings - the oleander poison seemed particularly resonant..so many intoxicating images and colours
ReplyDeleteGorgeous writing. I love the imagery.
ReplyDeleteYour words paint the mood perfectly. Bittersweet and painful.
ReplyDeleteEach verse has wonderful images that build up to that melancholy last line. Beautiful poem...
ReplyDeleteYour imagery is great the feeling of loss and emptyness is very strong, yet the last stanza hits like a hammer.
ReplyDelete