The New What’s Going On blog is prompting about birthdays this week. I’ve just had mine last week, so this is quite apt. Here is my poem to read and it’s accompanied by best wishes for all who are celebrating birthdays (and not necessarily the day of your birth!).
Birthday
There was no cake -
Too many carbs and empty calories;
Besides, sugar is evil we are told.
(Act your age, cake is for five-ear olds!)
Too many carbs and empty calories;
Besides, sugar is evil we are told.
(Act your age, cake is for five-ear olds!)
There were no candles -
Definitely a fire hazard!
And they always melt and make a mess on the frosting
(Anyway, there is no cake, and you don’t like eating wax, do you?)
Definitely a fire hazard!
And they always melt and make a mess on the frosting
(Anyway, there is no cake, and you don’t like eating wax, do you?)
There were no presents -
You have everything you need.
What do you want at your age?
(You’re too difficult to shop for anyway…)
You have everything you need.
What do you want at your age?
(You’re too difficult to shop for anyway…)
There was no party -
I’m sure the neighbours would complain,
Strangers popping in, noise, loud music all night
(Can you imagine yourself wearing a paper hat?)
I’m sure the neighbours would complain,
Strangers popping in, noise, loud music all night
(Can you imagine yourself wearing a paper hat?)
There was no card -
Who sends cards nowadays?
You’re lucky to get an email:
(With “Belated Birthday Wishes” a month later.)
Who sends cards nowadays?
You’re lucky to get an email:
(With “Belated Birthday Wishes” a month later.)
There was no alcohol -
In your condition? That’s a no-no,
Too many interactions with your medication.
(The doctor forbade it, you know it full well!)
In your condition? That’s a no-no,
Too many interactions with your medication.
(The doctor forbade it, you know it full well!)
So I went out alone to the pub,
And had a good counter meal with a nice wine.
There was a piece of cake with a candle on it afterwards;
And the barman sang “Happy Birthday”
And everyone joined in.
I felt quite merry, and the fellow patrons too.
There was music playing on the jukebox
And we all danced like there was no tomorrow,
With no complaints from anyone.
And had a good counter meal with a nice wine.
There was a piece of cake with a candle on it afterwards;
And the barman sang “Happy Birthday”
And everyone joined in.
I felt quite merry, and the fellow patrons too.
There was music playing on the jukebox
And we all danced like there was no tomorrow,
With no complaints from anyone.
A touch of indigestion later,
A deep sleep (thank you, alcohol/medication interactions!),
A bit of molten wax on my coat sleeve,
A gift of a bottle of champagne in the fridge,
And in my pocket a little card,
Scribbled in neat, flowery script:
“Happy Birthday, from Julia!
That was great fun tonight.
Call me… 74530029
It's my birthday next week.”
A deep sleep (thank you, alcohol/medication interactions!),
A bit of molten wax on my coat sleeve,
A gift of a bottle of champagne in the fridge,
And in my pocket a little card,
Scribbled in neat, flowery script:
“Happy Birthday, from Julia!
That was great fun tonight.
Call me… 74530029
It's my birthday next week.”
Sounds ideal all the way around, and serendipitous to boot!
ReplyDeleteLoved your Cicero quote on mine!
Haha! This made me chuckle. Fantastic irony throughout, Nick. Happy belated birthday! I hope you give Julia a call ;-)
ReplyDeleteOh, I absolutely adore this poem. I love the progression, the story. I was so happy he at last had some conversation and cake at the pub, but then the surprise ending which made me grin from ear to ear!
ReplyDeleteThis is such an entertaining poem. Thanks for the grin!!!!
ReplyDeleteYes, exactly what I am trying to avoid sugar and all. You write so well
ReplyDeleteThat's great, Greetings
ReplyDeleteI am glad your birthday was celebrated in the end with cake and kindness! Jae
ReplyDeleteBelated Happy Birthday!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a delight to read this birthday poem! And thank you for the smile.
ReplyDeleteBeware of Julias bearing gifts ! At least she didn't leave a wooden horse in your backyard:)
ReplyDelete