Poetry Jam for the latest challenge directs: “This week, write a poem about a graveyard…” In addition, there is added condition that the poem must be 28 lines or less. Here is my offering:
Spring Funeral
Spring deep in earth awakens sodden seeds
Making more acute my pressing needs;
The rain that gently falls will wash me clean
No more will I my painful memories glean.
I loved you such a long time ago
And yet I chose dreams to forego.
The greenwood leaves unfurl and open fresh
The breeze still cool, tempers my burning flesh;
Desires, passions, loves I bury deep in earth
Path chosen, heart dies, mind more is worth.
I loved you such a long time ago
But now allegro turns to largo.
As flowers fresh are laid by a new dug grave
Your thin disguised betrayal I forgave;
The falling night will usher in the stars
Silence – except for mournful cries of nightjars.
I loved you such a long time ago
Now where to turn? To whom to go?
interesting last couple stanzas...the betrayal of death...leaving them behind to deal with life alone...
ReplyDeletei know that...effective use of repetition...
This is si sad, Nicholas... Beautifully poignant with the sense of loss and despair.
ReplyDeleteSad. Isn't it odd that something this personal and painful is a daily common occurrence experienced by almost everyone on the planet at some point? Still doesn't take away the pain.
ReplyDeletewhen passions, desires, loves everything is buried deep how can the heart live?...a very poignant write...
ReplyDeletePoignant reflections, Nick. I really like the way you expressed allegro turning to largo. Some losses live in one's mind for a long time.
ReplyDeleteSad and very touching, Nicholas.
ReplyDeleteThis is very poignant, Nick. Death can indeed feel like betrayal in a way although it is one that is easier to forgive.
ReplyDeleteThe repeated line "I loved you such a long time ago" is so bittersweet. A moment of reflection and pain.
ReplyDeletepoignant, a sense of sweet sorrow that never seems to go completely away, like the repetition itself... I like the contrast & possibility of hope for rebirth the photo offers
ReplyDeleteSkillfully done. I know there is a story in this and you hint at it very effectively.
ReplyDeleteLovely poem capturing the melancholy of loss and betrayal. The recurring refrain adds to the poignancy...
ReplyDeleteA sad poem of death and finality. My grandmother used to say just keep on putting one foot in front of the other....tis all we can do !
ReplyDeleteA lovely expression of loss: well crafted - the form lends itself well, to an elegy, of sorts.
ReplyDeletebeautiful lines..of betrayal and to face life alone is difficult..
ReplyDeleteSo many beautiful lines in this Nicholas. A sad yet moving and beautiful write!
ReplyDeletebeautifully woven~
ReplyDeleteexcept for mournful cries of nightjars.- I just love that, excellent line that really captures the heart. Excellent.
ReplyDeletemoving piece ~
ReplyDeleteBeautifuly melancholic and I too, like the repetition of the line.
ReplyDeleteI loved you such a long time ago
ReplyDeleteNow where to turn? To whom to go?
nice lines and so many times a good question