DRUGS

“He does not need opium. He has the gift of reverie.” - Anais Nin

I had some rather startling and very sad news today. From an old acquaintance I learnt that one of my university friends whom I had not seen for years had lost his job, got a divorce and in a few months time had lost everything and had become hooked on drugs. He had always been a bit of a loner, a rather withdrawn and introverted individual, quirky, sometimes acidly pessimistic. We all liked him nevertheless and whenever he drank (always whisky) he became morbidly facetious, quite brash. When we graduated he had become quite successful as an academic, then started his own business, finally to move interstate, where he got married. I had not heard form him for many years. And now this second hand news and what a melancholy lot it was too…

Apparently he’s been in and out of gaol, he’s tried to give up the drugs, but he’s been unsuccessful in his attempts. The last time anybody heard of him he was living in a disused factory with some fellow squatters. The factory has now been demolished, making way for apartments and so our old fellow student disappeared.

One hears about drugs, sees the news reports, reads the papers and magazines, even hears of it around one. Until it hits closer to home, until it is someone one knows, one does not realise how drugs destroy lives so completely…

For Song Saturday today, Greek song dedicated to my old fellow student


For My Own Good

I saw my world get demolished in front of me
I saw my neighbourhood become dilapidated
For my own good,
I saw the trees I used to climb on cut down,
I saw my dreams all loaded in a removalist’s truck
For my own good.
I saw the teacher beat me with zeal,
I saw my hands swollen from the strapping,
I saw my nerves become slowly shattered,
As they beat me with compassion and affection.

For my own good
For my own good,
Until my mind couldn’t take it any more,
It took backward turns, for my own good,
And now I’m in room number nine, for my own good,
In its serenity, hoping to find myself.

I saw them share their bread with me,
I saw them making clothes out of my old clothes,
I saw my mother weeping hopelessly,
I saw my old man emigrate,
For my own good,
I saw my friends trying to help me,
I saw them telling me to give you up.
I saw myself one dawn being dragged to the police station,
And so as to be set free to say whatever I needed to say…

For my own good
For my own good,
Until my mind couldn’t take it any more,
It took backward turns, for my own good,
And now I’m in room number nine, for my own good,
In its serenity, hoping to find myself.

For my own good,
For my own good,
There, where my brain and body become numb,
Injections, pills, electroshock treatments, for my own good,
Today they took away the man next to me, dead;
While I struggle to find myself,
And I have a hidden knife with me, for my own good…
Για το Καλό μου

Είδα ένα κόσμο να γκρεμίζεται μπροστά μου
Είδα να γίνεται γιαπί η γειτονιά μου,
Για το καλό μου.
Είδα τα δέντρα που σκαρφαλώνα κομμένα
Στο φορτηγό τα όνειρα φορτωμένα,
Για το καλό μου…
Είδα το δάσκαλο να με χτυπάει με ζήλο
Είδα τα χέρια μου πρησμένα απ’ το ξύλο,
Είδα τα νεύρα μου σιγά-σιγά να σπάνε
Με καλοσύνη και με στοργή να με χτυπάνε.

Για το καλό μου,
Για το καλό μου.
Ώσπου δεν άντεξε στο τέλος το μυαλό μου,
Πήρε ανάποδες στροφές γαι το καλό μου
Και είμαι στο θάλαμο εννιά για το καλό μου,
Στην ηρεμία, για να βρω τον εαυτό μου.

Είδα να κόβουν τη μπουκιά για τη μπουκιά μου
Ρούχα να φτιάχνουν απ΄τα ρούχα τα παλιά μου.
Είδα τη μάνα μου να κλαίει απελπισμένα
Είδα το γέρο μου να φεύγει για τα ξένα
Για το καλό μου,
Είδα τους φίλους μου να σκίζονται για μένα
Είδα να θέλουν να ξεκόψω από σένα.
Είδα χαράματα να με τραβάν στο τμήμα
Για να γλιτωσω το κελλί να πω το ποίημα.

Για το καλό μου,
Για το καλό μου.
Ώσπου δεν άντεξε στο τέλος το μυαλό μου,
Πήρε ανάποδες στροφές γαι το καλό μου
Και είμαι στο θάλαμο εννιά για το καλό μου,
Στην ηρεμία μήπως βρω τον εαυτό μου.

Για το καλό μου,
Για το καλό μου,
Εκεί μουδιάζει το κορμί και το μυαλό μου
Ενέσεις, χάπια, ηλεκτροσόκ, για το καλό μου.
Σήμερα πήρανε νεκρό τον διπλανό μου,
Ενώ παλεύω για να βρω τον εαυτό μου
Κι έχω κρυμμένο το σουγιά, για το καλό μου…